Getting What I Deserve
Five months later and 20lbs lighter, I am happy to report that I feel the inner babe that had been lost for so long has finally been found. I enjoy shopping again. I enjoy going out with my slightly younger and stretchmark free friends without feeling frumpy. I know that it may be politically incorrect, but I am happier and more confident when I feel attractive. Any woman who says her self esteem is not wrapped up in her physical appearance is, more often than not, unhappy with her physical appearance.
I’d like to wax philosphical about how my more muscular body makes me feel powerful and how I did it so I would have more energy to play with my kids, but that would be a lie. I did it to look good in a bikini and wear smaller pants. (sorry to disappoint you) I also did it to be more desireable to my husband because, although he would never admit it, he is more attracted to me when I look good (crazy huh?).
I guess my one Oprah revelation from this whole experience would be that I deserve to have everything I want. If I want to have time to do something for myself, I should make time. I know to some people, waking up at 5am to go to the gym may sound like torture. To me, this is my only time to do something just for me. I deserve to feel good about my body and treat it with respect. This body created and carried two of my favorite humans in the universe and it deserves to be cared for.
Five years ago I married a sexy, wonderful man. I deserve to feel desired by him. If I don’t like the way I look, I don’t feel sexy. Believe me, sex is much more enjoyable when you feel sexy.
Tune in next time and I’ll tell you how I did it.